


Happier

by senpyi



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: American Revolution, Angst and Feels, Based on a song by Ed Sheeran, Broken Families, Canon Compliant, Complicated Relationships, Countries Using Human Names, Dialogue Light, Inner Dialogue, Loneliness, M/M, Male Friendship, Shorts, Spain and France are only mentioned sorry, Thought Projection, Two Shot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-13
Updated: 2018-07-13
Packaged: 2019-06-10 01:34:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15280668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/senpyi/pseuds/senpyi
Summary: England and America both look back on their time together before the American Revolutionary war and how much their relationship has changed. Based on Happier by Ed Sheeran.





	Happier

**Author's Note:**

> If you wish to listen to the song that inspired me to write this, click/copy and paste the link here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TpcBDJZsJA. Enjoy reading and please leave feedback! :)

 

> "My friends told me one day I'll feel it too  
>  And until then I'll smile to hide the truth  
>  But I know I was happier with you"-Ed Sheeran, _Happier_

* * *

 

He glanced across the room at the bubbly man who was loudly telling exaggerated stories about himself and how heroic he was. ‘ _There he goes again with that bloody hero stuff again…_ ’ he thought. Even from when he was little, Alfred had not changed much. Still the excruciatingly loud, eccentric and bubbly man he was before…before the war.

Arthur did not even know why he had come. It was like torture, celebrating his birthday. Antonio and Francis kept saying one day that the war will only be a mere blip in their relationship, that the pain would lessen so much he wouldn’t even feel it anymore but they didn’t understand, they never did. He only wished he were alone so he could drink himself silly and forget about the past. Forget about what this day meant to him.

Every time he looked at Alfred too long or sometimes, even when he was he talking to him, there was a sharp pang in his chest and a sinking feeling in his stomach. ‘ _After all this time_ ,’ he thought ‘ _I still cannot forgive him, everything still hurts_ ’. Sometimes, when he were alone, he would think back to the days when Alfred were only a little boy and he a young man. How he smiled at him then and his bright blue eyes shone, how they were always together and he no longer felt so so isolated and alone, how he would look at him like nothing else mattered, like he was the best big brother ever and he would convince himself ‘ _He should’ve **stayed** with me! He was **better off** with me!_ ’.

Then, he would think about the times they shared before everything was torn apart, how Alfred would disobey him at every turn, how everything seemed to change and when he tried to guide Alfred, Alfred would pull away from him even harder. Finally, he was back there again, a gun pointed firmly at Alfred as Alfred tried to explain he didn’t wish to hurt him, he just wanted his own freedom. Arthur couldn’t wrap his head around it. He’d given him freedom, he wasn’t ever forcing him to do anything. He was just raising him, teaching him and protecting him how he knew best. That’s exactly what big brothers do… _right?_ That was it, right? And he doubted himself for a second but only for a second because looking back on how things were before, he couldn’t see he had done anything all **_that_ ** wrong. Yes, he had made mistakes as any parental figure would but not any major ones, he thought, not anything that would lead to…this. But then as he looked deeply into Alfred’s eyes, he saw the pain. He didn’t know if it was pain from tarnishing their bond as brothers or something else.

So as Arthur’s mind finally came back into the present and he looked over at Alfred again to see him smiling brightly and eyes shining like sapphire gems, he thought…

‘ _ **You look happier, Alfred...you really do**_.'

**Author's Note:**

> I hope that everyone has enjoyed reading this chapter. Please leave feedback and/or even kudos if you like it that much as I have had a massive break from writing (most of which is posted on my deviantart account) and so I would appreciate it if you told me what it was I needed to do to really get back into the swing of things :D


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